January 2019
Have you ever found yourself in a place of dissatisfaction, or just not feeling contented in your life? A job, a relationship, your physical body, home. or feeling uncomfortable in your own skin? This may manifest as sensations of swiming upstream, against the current –strufggling–instead of flowing in your life and the day to day. Often we feel a mix of both, the struggle and the flow. Sometimes it all goes to hell. And at other times, you are humming along with miraculous synchronicity, completely in a state of flow.
2013 was the year my life was dismantled, at least the career and health parts. Having been an oncology nurse for 25 years—working at a hospital and with colleagues I intended to spend the rest of my career with—it all came crashing down. It’s taken me several years to understand how to truly find my flow, let go of what was, accept what is before me now. Bit by bit, and piece by piece I have been rebuilding my life, listening for cues, surrendering to a body limited by chronic illness. What can I do now? How can I find new purpose and meaning with my life? I miss taking care of people. I miss my patients… These were a few of the phrases ricocheting throughout my mind, starting around 2016, once I got a bit of a foothold on my health. I began to understand that this body of mine—once able to work actively as a nurse, run, bike, ski, travel, dance! (oh, how I miss dancing), socialize in the evenings, and more—was relegated to a daily adherence of resting, small spurts of activities at a time, and flowing with persistent symptoms.
The past years have been a winding and interesting path of letting go of “the old” and creating “the new.” Accepting the new. But here I am. I’m not exactly sure where this new life will be taking me, but I’m excited to be in this fresh, new chapter. As I write this first blog post for “From My Heart to Yours,” I just wish to say that it’s my hope that we all find that magical flow. That you have more days of synchronicity, rather than struggle. And that during times of struggle, lifeboats appear and comforting blankets of balm soothe the weary spirit.
I invite you to cue into the messages of your life. Where is the struggle? Where is the flow? Remember to breathe. Tune in. Tap in to your inner well of wisdom. We all have it.
Thank you for visiting my blog! I look forward to connecting and sharing, and being inspired by you!
All the best,
Gretchen
I want to to thank you for this wonderful read!! I definitely loved every bit of it.
I have got you saved as a favorite to check out new
things you post…
Thank you! I really appreciate it. All the best to you.
Nice food photography in your recipe section.
Your Healing Journey reminds me of Steve Jobs’ commencement speech at Stanford (no, I wasn’t there). He essentially said you can look back to see how you connected the dots to get where you are today, but you cannot predict which dots to connect in your future. But if you always follow your passion to connect the next dot, you will get to where you are supposed to be.
Looks like you became the Martha Stewart of oncology. Congratulations. Just connect one dot at a time and don’t regret what you can’t change in the past, or worry about what you can’t predict in the future.
Oh yeah, “there’s one more thing…” that Steve Jobs mentioned. He heard someone say live each day like it is your last because eventually you will be right.
Thank you for your kind and inspiring words, you’ve added wisdom that I greatly appreciate.